Depression in mothers: a growing crisis
Maternal depression is a major public health problem in the United States, with an estimated 1 in 10 children experiencing a depressed mother in any given year. Professionals who work with mothers and children should be aware of its prevalence and its detrimental effects. (NCBI Resources)
I believed for 9 whole years that I am not a good enough mom. I kept telling myself repeatedly that being a stay-at-home mom may not be the best thing for me, it’s best for my family, for my child. I must be able to stay happy with this job or others, especially my husband thinks of me. Still, I could not help burying that deep-down desire to have some individual identity of my own outside of motherhood. A mom friend of mine used to wake up crying every morning and always thought that she was just having a bad day. She tried medications and communicating. She finally saw a therapist and joined a school to dig herself out of the darkness.
Like me or my friend, too many American women experience emotional crises as they navigate motherhood. Hormones are often considered the key reason for compromised mental health in moms, most of the challenges come from society’s gender expectations and responses to motherhood. Following are key reasons responsible for impacting the mental health of new or old mothers.
Sleep deprivation
Lack of sleep is the second name for motherhood, and moms contended with the years of interrupted sleep. The fact that no one wants to acknowledge that they are exhausted. This certainly leads to mental health issues, anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem.
Mom guilt
Believe it not, moms are the most judged by society, by themselves. This guilt starts in pregnancy and grows only worse as family, in-laws, partners keep finding out flaws in mothers. Anything that goes awry with the child, mothers are to be blamed. Moms are susceptible to feeling guilty all the time because they want to believe that they are the chief architects of their children’s lives.
Work-life balance
I read it somewhere that women are supposed to work as if they don’t have to mother, and they are supposed to mother as if they don’t have a career. These clashing and contradicting expectations take a psychological toll on women as millions of working moms sacrifice to balance each day. And whatever they miss, adds only to their guilt stock.
Discrimination at work
Women often face unequal pay or treatment. Work-life balancing already takes a toll, then mansplaining, and barriers to upward mobility create further mental health issues. Most organizational cultures reward men out of proportion, which can be very subtle and difficult to fight.
Those stretch marks and that unfit body
Body shaming is another challenge that moms face. Instagram is full of pictures of celebrity moms stunningly fit and without stretch marks. The whole world tells them with a grin - if they can, why cannot you! This whole scenario contributes to a lack of self-worth, self-loathing, and eating disorders.
Domestic violence and abuse
A significant number of moms face domestic violence, and financial, sexual, and emotional abuse every single day. Even if they decide to leave a toxic relationship, the psychological trauma lingers, and they may be easily triggered.
Single motherhood
Millions of American children are currently being raised by single mothers. Most single mothers accept sleep deprivation, stigma, conflict with an ex, and financial insecurity as a part of the deal. Minimum wage keeps many single moms below the poverty line – even if they are working full time! These hardships often trigger anxiety and depression. Single moms are doing a great job but at the cost of their mental health.
The Kia D Unplugged Show feat. the Hot Topic panel
The Kia D Unplugged Show feat. the Hot Topic panel
Shine Lord Radio Show feat. Pastor Jeremy Glen (The Power of Faith Work)
Shine Lord Radio Show feat. Pastor Jeremy Glen (The Power of Faith Work) on http://www.WeTalkRadio.com.
Spirit of Inspiring Love Church is a ministry that Inspires the Love of Christ through the sound teaching of the Word of God.
https://soilchurch.online.church/
Shine Lord Radio Show feat. Pastor Jeremy Glen (The Power of Faith Work)
Shine Lord Radio Show feat. Pastor Jeremy Glen (The Power of Faith Work) on http://www.WeTalkRadio.com.
Spirit of Inspiring Love Church is a ministry that Inspires the Love of Christ through the sound teaching of the Word of God.
https://soilchurch.online.church/
The Cave Radio Show feat Gospel artist Titus Showers
The Cave Radio Show feat National Gospel artist Titus Showers. Hosted by TSmiley every Saturday morning at 10am(CST) on http://www.WeTalkRadio.com.
Multiple chart-topping independent recording artist and songwriter Titus Showers, a native of
Hammond, Louisiana is certainly an artist to watch. Two Stellar Award nominations, two #1 gospel
albums, a #1 radio single and five career top 30 songs. On Youtube, he has eclipsed 1 million
views. And he’s rocked national TV performances such as the 2021 Presidential Inauguration
Gospel Celebration for the 46th President Joe Biden, BET’s 2020 Stellar Awards, CBN’s The 700
Club, BET’s Bobby Jones Gospel Show and Stellar Tribute to the Holidays to name a few.
On January 15, 2021, he digitally released a powerful new song “We Need You” and its exactly
what we all need right now. The record, which was produced by Vaughan Phoenix and written by
Titus, Ernest Vaughan and Owen Nixon is the follow to his radio hit “It’s Gonna Be Alright Remix”
featuring Jermaine Dolly, which reached #1 on the Billboard Gospel Airplay chart in October 2020
spending 11 consecutive weeks in the Top 30. On the Gospel Airplay chart the song cracked Top
10 on Billboard’s Hot Gospel Songs chart peaking at #9, while his digital release of the classic
cover tune “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” (Nov. 27, 2020) landed on iTunes Top 200
Holiday Digital Song chart.
Titus is among the area’s most famous, respected and boasts no less
than seven businesses owned and operated by his siblings. Whenever he is back home, Titus serves
as COO of one of the family’s enterprises: O&M Family Care, a community-based mental health
care agency (his brother Timothy is CEO).
The Cave Radio Show feat Gospel artist Titus Showers
The Cave Radio Show feat National Gospel artist Titus Showers. Hosted by TSmiley every Saturday morning at 10am(CST) on http://www.WeTalkRadio.com.
Multiple chart-topping independent recording artist and songwriter Titus Showers, a native of
Hammond, Louisiana is certainly an artist to watch. Two Stellar Award nominations, two #1 gospel
albums, a #1 radio single and five career top 30 songs. On Youtube, he has eclipsed 1 million
views. And he’s rocked national TV performances such as the 2021 Presidential Inauguration
Gospel Celebration for the 46th President Joe Biden, BET’s 2020 Stellar Awards, CBN’s The 700
Club, BET’s Bobby Jones Gospel Show and Stellar Tribute to the Holidays to name a few.
On January 15, 2021, he digitally released a powerful new song “We Need You” and its exactly
what we all need right now. The record, which was produced by Vaughan Phoenix and written by
Titus, Ernest Vaughan and Owen Nixon is the follow to his radio hit “It’s Gonna Be Alright Remix”
featuring Jermaine Dolly, which reached #1 on the Billboard Gospel Airplay chart in October 2020
spending 11 consecutive weeks in the Top 30. On the Gospel Airplay chart the song cracked Top
10 on Billboard’s Hot Gospel Songs chart peaking at #9, while his digital release of the classic
cover tune “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” (Nov. 27, 2020) landed on iTunes Top 200
Holiday Digital Song chart.
Titus is among the area’s most famous, respected and boasts no less
than seven businesses owned and operated by his siblings. Whenever he is back home, Titus serves
as COO of one of the family’s enterprises: O&M Family Care, a community-based mental health
care agency (his brother Timothy is CEO).
Living With Severe Anxiety
Living With Severe Anxiety
By Autumn Faggett
Imagine that its Saturday night. You are perched on the most comfortable piece of furniture in your house doing the thing you love the most. Then suddenly, your chest tightens. It becomes harder to breathe even though you were not in a state of activity. Your heart is racing as though you have just run a marathon. You start feeling as though you are in danger. Like there is someone out to get you in your own home. You know that the only people in your house is the people you love, but somehow the feeling of danger still lurks in your mind. The extremity of these physical and emotional feelings continues for what seems like a lifetime, and you start to feel as though your world is ending.
Then just as quickly as those feelings began, they disappear. You are baffled by what just happened as your body calms down. Without a diagnosis, you go about your business doing what you were doing before, hoping that those feelings do not return.
You have just had a panic attack.
Normal people may experience panic attacks one or two times in their lifetime as a response to extreme amounts of stress such as the loss of a family member, or major life changes that involve uncertainty. However, for people like me, who suffer from severe anxiety under a condition called, General Anxiety Disorder (G.A.D), panic attacks happen often without the proper reason to occur. Because anxiety is the body’s natural response to stress everyone at some point will experience anxiety. Anxiety can occur from excitement or somber occasions, but regardless, it will happen. The only difference between normal anxiety and severe anxiety is the rate at which the anxiety occurs.
In hopes that my story will help someone, I am going to share my story below from the perspective of a southern, African American woman in her early twenties.
I had my first panic attack when I was thirteen years old. My grandfather was just admitted to the hospital for the first time, and I was in school when my mother first sent me the dreaded text. She was coming to get me out of class early, but at the time, I was eager to leave school just so I could see my grandfather for perhaps the last time. At that moment in time, it was not going to be the last time I saw my grandfather, but my anxiety plagued me with all kinds of worries of what could happen in the hospital while I was not there. I worried so much about not being there when my grandfather died that my body thought that I was in a state of danger, and the panic attack came as swiftly as my worries. My teacher thought that I was having a heart attack and sent me to the nurses that could not figure out what was going on with my body. Eventually, the attack subsided, but the memory of that attack resonates with me today.
That single attack makes my stomach churn because if I had sought out mental help sooner, I would not have suffered from my anxiety as long as I let myself suffer from it. When my mother picked my twin and I up from school that day, I was too embarrassed and ashamed to tell her that I had an incident with the nurses. I could not bring myself to tell her while her father lay in the hospital. Worrying about the health of my grandfather was only the beginning of all the worrying I would do through high school and my college years. Worrying about things out of my control, about social activities, how I looked, and the perception others had of me prevented me from living my best life during the times I should have been having the most fun.
My anxiety prevented me from being able to relax and enjoy the things I formally would spend hours doing. My anxiety prevented me from pursuing relationships from people who had a genuine interest in me as a larger woman. My anxiety caused me to stray from the tight relationships I formed in middle school with people who I talked to well-into college because I worried that not talking to them for an extended amount of time made them hate me. My anxiety made me quit jobs over minor mistakes that were easily forgettable, yet I would stay up all night crying over those simple mistakes because I believed that I was bringing everyone down at my workplace.
And finally, after 12 years of letting my anxiety rule and ruin my life, I finally sought out help at the end of 2020. As a black woman of an emotionally unavailable mother, I was too afraid to seek mental help since my family always had a stigma against mental health. Seeking therapy took the greatest amount of courage I could ever muster from myself. Getting the diagnosis of why I always felt the way I was feeling felt like a boulder was being lifted off my shoulders. Even though my mother teased me over my condition at first, she became slightly more understanding as I educated her on GAD. With the help of antidepressants and calming pills, I now feel like I have the freedom to do things I never would have imagined myself doing.
I can say with pride that seeking help changed my life for the better. Although I have a long way to go to recovery, just the simple step of seeking help dramatically changed my outlook on life.
For anyone who is doubting that they may have severe anxiety, I encourage you to look at what your anxiety is making you miss out on. Ask yourself; is this anxiety affecting my relationships? Is my anxiety causing me to ruin my performance at my job or school? Is my anxiety making me miss the best parts of my life? Is my anxiety consistently infiltrating my day-to-day activities? If you have said yes to any of these questions. Please, do not wait to seek help and let your anxiety get out of control the way I allowed mine to.
You should consult your everyday doctor or licensed professional therapist to help you work through your anxiety, and the symptoms that come with anxiety. Do not wait because you feel embarrassed or ashamed of these symptoms. You cannot help how you feel, and you will only hurt yourself further if you do not seek help.
If you’re still wondering if you have severe anxiety, please use the link below and use this free quiz provided by Rogers Behavioral Health below.
https://rogersbh.org/anxietyquiz
Thank you for reading my tale. Have a wonderful day and I hope this has helped you understand anxiety a little more!
Taking Care of Me: A story of overcoming anxiety, depression, and trauma
Taking Care of Me
A story of overcoming anxiety, depression, and trauma.
By Keely Messino
I started therapy about a year ago for anxiety, depression, and the effects of past trauma. The journey to wellness has been a roller coaster; there was so much more involved in the journey than I ever could have foreseen. I’m really involved in the process of learning about myself, getting to know all the things about myself, the good things about myself, the things that I like about myself, as well as my flaws and the things that need to be worked o., Everyone has something about themselves that they want to change.
I wanted to work on some deep-seated fears. I struggle with many anxiety triggers due to my disability as well as my past trauma. As time passed, I dealt with the fact that I will never fully “heal” while I am getting better, but instead, I would learn to cope with my mental health struggles.
Hearing the words “You’re never done healing” was both a gift and a curse. Those words made me feel so conflicted. I know the purpose of those words was to make me feel like I didn’t have to be hard on myself if I were struggling or if I experienced a setback. On the other hand, I’ve been a student for my entire life, all classwork has a deadline, and I wanted to know when I “was supposed to be better” or “how long therapy was supposed to last.” There is no deadline to healing.
When I was at my lowest, I was sleeping very little, and I was eating sweets to cope with the unpleasant feelings.
The lack of sleep was taking a huge toll on my body and my mind. I would cry myself to sleep at night, and the pain in my body was never-ending. Sometimes I would drink a few glasses of wine just so that I could fall asleep. I finally went to the doctor, and he offered me medication for my pain and my mood. I had so many mixed emotions. I was scared—some people in my family struggle with alcohol abuse. I questioned if the medicine was additive. The doctor told me that addiction was not a risk.
Within a few weeks, I started to see an improvement. I was calmer, and the pain was almost completely gone. In addition, I was sleeping through the night.
I went to visit family recently; my family noticed the little yellow medicine bottle in my purse and asked what it was for. At first, I didn’t answer; I was worried about being judged for taking these meds. But eventually, the questions became too much, and I talked about my medical issues with my family. There is no shame in taking care of my needs and putting myself first.
Celebrating 4 Asian American and Pacific Islander Changemakers
Asian American and Pacific Islander Heritage Month
May is Asian American and Pacific Islander Heritage month. Here at WeTalkRadio Network we want to highlight Asian American and Pacific Islander individuals who have made an impact on the world!
Peter Tsai
One Asian American and Pacific Islander, or AAPI, who has done great things to help our world is Peter Tsai. He is a Taiwanese American who created the N95 mask. He led a team that created the mask while he was a professor at the University of Tennessee, Knoxville. Even though he retired in 2018, he came out of retirement in 2020 to help find new ways to disinfect N95 masks. He has been instrumental in getting COVID-19 under control.
Eric Yuan
Another AAPI that has played a big role during the pandemic is Eric Yuan. Born in China, Yuan moved to Silicon Valley in 1997. He quickly got started working on American technology, and founded Zoom in 2011. In 2020, Zoom technology became a huge part of most people’s lives. If it weren’t for Eric Yuan, communicating would have been exponentially more difficult during these trying times.
Lisa Ling
One more AAPI to watch is Lisa Ling. She is a journalist who has been prolific over the last 30 years of her journalism career. She has had many journalistic roles over the years, including being a co-host on The View, hosting National Geographic’s Explorer, and being a special correspondent on The Oprah Winfrey Show. Today, she covers profound topics while traveling across the country on her show This is Life With Lisa Ling airing on CNN.
Rupi Kaur
Additionally, Rupi Kaur is an up and coming AAPI poet. She initially gained popularity by sharing her poetry and associated drawings on the social media website Tumblr. In 2014, she self-published her poetry book Milk and Honey. It covers feminists topics, including immigration, relationships, and trauma. Her book quickly gained popularity on social media, and was re-published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. It has now sold more than three million copies. Rupi Kaur has since published two more books, titled The Sun and Her Flowers and Home Body.